What Is Confidence
Webster Dictionary defines Confidence as the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust. The state of feeling certain about the truth of something; a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities. Some of us are naturally confident and some of us have to implement tools and practices to gain confidence. You’ve stumbled across this page because you want to learn how to improve your self-confidence. There are steps that you can implement to improve your confidence and your self-esteem.
As you focus on building your confidence, don’t forget to take time out for self-care as it is an overall factor in helping you to grow to love yourself and the skin that you are in. Read our 21 Steps to Daily Self-Care.
You Are Your Only Competition
The way you feel about yourself has a direct impact on your self-confidence. Here are a few easy ways to boost your self-confidence and self-esteem.
I’ve never compared myself to anyone. I’ve never wanted to be anyone but myself. That is not to say that I haven’t admired qualities in others and implemented those qualities for myself.
Over the years, I have definitely had sister friends that were always comparing themselves to someone else. Between what someone else looks like, to what they have, I’ve seen and heard it all
The only thing that matters is to compare yourself to the person in the mirror. Comparing yourself to someone else will only serve to stress you out.
Often times you are comparing your beginning to someone else’s middle or end. As you live this thing called life, you should come across tons of people that are smarter, prettier, more talented, have bigger houses, smaller houses, bigger butts, smaller butts, bigger boobs, etc., guess what it doesn’t matter not one bit.
21 Ways To Boost Self Confidence
- Think positive
- Get to know yourself
- Get active
- Design your self-image
- Think positive
- Dress nicely
- Groom yourself
- Know your principles and live them
- Speak slowly
- Exercise
- Clear your desk
- Work on small things
- Perfect something over the next 100 days
- Learn to say no to others
- Learn to be assertive
- Give yourself a challenge
- Accomplish one goal
- Be kind and generous
- Tackle something that makes you uncomfortable, ie., public speaking
- Kill negative thoughts
- Build a confident mindset. When that inner voice says “No, or I can’t” retrain it to simply say ” Yes, I can, I will, I shall.”
Why Confidence Matters
Confidence prepares you for all of life’s experiences. When you tap into your inner confidence it shines through on the outside. It enables us to tackle problems as opportunities vs. distractions. We’ve all seen that individual that walks into a room and looks like they own it. That is confidence – not arrogance. If things don’t go as planned, confidence enables us to get back up and try again.
Believing in yourself and what you can achieve is all in having a confident mindset. It’s important to verbalize your confidence, hence I suggest finding affirmations that you say to yourself on a daily basis. One of my favorite affirmations that I say daily is – “I’m a badass and I will make a difference in the world today.”
Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand brake on.” — Maxwell Maltz
Know yourself and you will win all battles. – Sun Tzu
One important key to success is self-confidence. A key to self-confidence is preparation. – Arthur Ashe
Somehow I can’t believe that there are any heights that can’t be scaled by a man who knows the secrets of making dreams come true. This special secret, it seems to me, can be summarized in four C s. They are curiosity, confidence, courage, and constancy, and the greatest of all is confidence. When you believe in a thing, believe in it all the way, implicitly and unquestionable. – Walt Disney
Above are a few of my favorite quotes. Self Confidence is a verb, not a noun. You must practice self-confidence on a daily basis.
Self Love
We have to learn that it is ok to take off your superwoman armor and just relax. We are not the savior of everyone. The moment you begin to practice self-love, I promise an entire new world will be at your fingertips. We all are guilty of making excuses and putting things off for another day. I’m here to tell you that you can take a spa day, you can kick your feet up and read a good book, you can lose 5lbs, you can go on vacation alone, and you can splurge if you desire.
No more excuses, no more competition. Every day you should wake up and tell the individual staring back at you from the mirror, that you are a Goddess and you are covered by the Goddess Effect. Goddesses are fearless, bold, gracious, smart, savvy, wise, and dignified.
Self-love also includes learning how to tell people NO.. It’s ok to say NO. You don’t have to justify your time. NO is NO!
Revaluate Your Goals
- Review the goals you previously set; did you achieve any of them.
- Make sure your goal is SMART. (specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-based goals )
- Write down your goals and objectives for the remaining of 2022
- Re-tweak your vision board
- Establish daily goals that are manageable and achievable. (it’s easy to just eat 100% healthy for one day, vs trying for 7 days. You can reset it every morning.
- Keep a journal or a planner to track your goals.
- Find small ways to stick to your goals.
- Find ways to self-motivate when setting goals.
- This is the only time it’s ok to compete with your sista circle, make your goals into a friendly competition.
Give Thanks
Don’t allow life to stress you out. My philosophy is simple if my house is not on fire and my sons are ok, then all is well in the universe. You have a great life. Embrace today and all that you have. Focusing on the negative will not change it. Focus on the positive aspects and the goodness that is at your fingertips
Chuck Up Your Dueces
I’m so talking to you right now. Chuck up your deuces and stop caring about what other people think about you. You are the master of your destiny. I haven’t cared about what someone thought about me since kindergarten.
Get Your Coins Under Control
Please do a budget and evaluate where you are spending money at. In order to live the best life possible, ya might need a few coins to fund some incredible trips. I won’t harp on this, just know that being habitually financially challenged is a choice.
No Compete Clause In My Circle Of Friends
Sista friend Rule 101, If you find yourself feeling out-of-sync with those in your tribe, then you may need to find new tribe members. My Tribe and I do not compete against each other. We all have valuable assets that we bring to the friendship table.
I once had a tribe member that no matter what you said you did, she would make a comment to imply that she knew more. It did not matter what the subject matter was. If you said you picked up a new client, she just picked up 4. If you said you ate at a fab restaurant, she already ate there and the food wasn’t that good. Needless to say, she is no longer in the tribe.
In order to achieve growth, you have to outgrow your environment.
I hope this inspired a Goddess to make a few simple changes; take some action that propels you forward.
Self Care
For the love of sweet baby Jesus, take time out for self-care. Put the following on your list of things to do. Here are 21 Self Care Ideas to Incorporate
- Open a Vacation Fund- yes it’s important to be able to just get up and go.
- Schedule a Spa Day on a regular basis
- Spend Brunch with a few friends.
- Time Block Yoga and Meditation into your schedule.
- Drink your water daily- do not overlook getting enough H2O
- Take up a hobby that you like
- Learn something new over the next 100 days.
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